In this post we will look at simple tips that can help people move on from a relationship after a breakup. We will also discuss the different techniques that a therapist can use to help their clients get over their breakup.
Many times.. LIFE.. Presents us with situations that we really don’t like.
Situations that are hard for us to handle; that tear us apart; that we wish to escape!; Situations that makes us lose the very essence of our living..! And one among this.., that we “HUMANS” still really don’t know how to manage (both the situation & ourselves) is loss of love!
Yes… No university, school, culture, or the law of the state.. really teaches us how to deal with breakup, how to manage rejection & the pain that comes with it. Most importantly how to still love oneself despite being left by the one we loved.
Tips to move on after Breakup
So here are few tips (that we hope you never need).. that will help you move on after a breakup!!
- Understand that.. People & things are “part” of our life & not our “life” in itself. It is you who is the lead actor of your life… So learn to live for yourself!! Engage your self in activities that you like… or learn things that you once wished to do (eg. baking; gardening;).
I understand.. this can be really hard.. You may not wish like doing anything.. But.. Try.. Try to take a step for “yourself”.
- Its an old saying “Nothing lasts forever”…!.. But the memories.. So cherish them.. that you had beautiful time together.. rather than crying over why they are no longer with you!
- If cherishing the memory doesn’t help, then Learn to “LET GO”… According to many religions, people & things that come in our life, come in our life for a ‘purpose’. They come to teach us the “lessons of life”. Once we learn our lessons.. they leave us. (So learn to ‘let go’… It’s only when old things are allowed to go… New things have space to come!!!)
- Enjoy your solitude… Make this experience a catalyst for your spiritual journey & self discovery ( rather than a scar!). Travel, shop, eat, read… All by yourself. For all you know, you may learn to enjoy your own company.
- Learn from your break-ups…, they are good teachers to show you.. What to not follow &… What to not repeat..!
- Have FAITH & HOPE …May be it’s nature’s way of saying…“You deserve better!”
- Give TIME… Time can be a powerful healer!
- Most importantly…. If you are still not able to move ahead by yourself, seek a therapist, psychologist or whatever other name you want to call them… They are specialists with primarily focus on helping people grow out of pain & become the best of themselves. Few sessions can do you a lot of good…!!!
Pointers provided in this article should make it easier for you to deal with the situations related to loss of love. If you are looking for clarity about what could you learn from your past relationship that will not just help you move on after the breakup but also be able to ensure that any future relationship you get into will be happier, healthier and more fulfilling. you must checkout our Online course on Ultimate Guide to Love, Dating and Relationship.
What needs to be done to help clients move on after a breakup:
- Most clients who are seeking help to get over a breakup, experience a combination of emotions. These emotions may range from fear, anxiety, worry about the future to guilt, helplessness, anger suppressed from the past.
- Helping the client move on after a breakup would require the therapist to work with all these emotions in a way that they can be understood, released and replaced. It is also important to help the client completely disconnect with the ex (physically, mentally and emotionally).
- The therapy sessions should not just enable the client move on after the breakup but should also prepare them for any future relationship that they may step into. This would require the client to be able to learn from the past relation.
- It will also be important to help the client become hopeful about living a happier life in future after moving on from the breakup.
Therapeutic Techniques to help clients move on after a breakup:
- Hoponopono, HypnoDrama and Inner Child Therapy can be used for helping the client work with anger, guilt and helplessness. Cord Cutting can be used to help the client disconnect with the ex at mental and emotional level.
- In order to work with fear, anxiety and worries: a combination of transformational metaphor, If-then statements and circle therapy can be used.
- Along with the various topics mentioned in this post, revelation metaphors and perceptual position process can be very useful to help the client learn from their past relationship.
- SOFT SEA™ coaching model can be used to help the client set a clearly defined goal in terms of what they wish to do post moving on from the breakup. This can help them become more hopeful about the future and also systematically plan to make this future a present.
All the techniques mentioned to help client move on after the breakup and many more are covered during our unique and comprehensive advanced therapeutic skill development program “Cognitive Hypnotic Psychotherapy™”. If you are looking for an eclectic approach that seamlessly integrates different approaches to psychotherapy (cognitive, behavioural, psycho-dynamics and humanistic), you don’t need to look any further. You would love this program just like many others who have been a part of it.